Let's Buy Some Shit
I buy a lot of shit. I don't have a shopping addiction, I just happen to buy a lot of shit. I'm going to start telling you about the shit I buy.
I'm not going to tell you to buy the shit I've bought, but I am going to tell you why I bought the shit, and maybe, you'll buy that same shit.
If you buy the shit that I buy, I might get paid. That's the point of this practice. I want to get paid for telling you about the shit that I buy.
There's a lofty phrase used by the people in the "tell people about the shit you've bought or haven't bought" industry, they call it "affiliate marketing", and, my god, it's a terrible name.
There's no trust in "affiliate marketing". The phrase, let's be honest, engenders the side eye. If you told me that you were an affiliate marketer, I'd laugh in your face.
The only job title worse than affiliate marketer? Influencer.
What's the difference? An affiliate marketer is an influencer without influence.
That's me. I don't have any influence, and honestly, I don't want to have any influence over other people. I just want to tell people about shit that I like.
I'm also, gulp, going to tell people about shit that I don't like, but it's evident that there's no money in telling people about shit I don't like.
What, then, is the reason to tell people about shit I don't like? It builds trust.
If I don't have the loyalty and trust of people who want to buy shit, then I'm shit.
